10/19/02

Dear Diary,

You would think that after all of the glowing reviews I received for my glowing review of The Diggs last show, the band would try to help me avoid embarrassing situations like the one I encountered last night with the bouncer at the Mint, which concluded with him stating, “I’m sorry Mr. Nesbit, you’re not on the guests list…that’ll be 7 bucks.”

I gave the man his blood money and he agreed to give me back my driver’s license. I stormed into the Mint with a glare in my eye and a chip on my shoulder, ready to give The Diggs the most scathing review they’d ever seen. Not only had they tricked me into paying for admission, they had also fooled me into arriving to the show early by telling that they went on at 8:30, when they really didn’t hit the stage until 9 p.m. Apparently they didn’t trust by ability to arrive on time. Gee guys, thanks for the vote of confidence.

So there I was, ten minutes early for the show. How was I going to kill time? I thought about talking to one of my fellow Diggs fans…but then I remember that they all thought I was an “asshole.” I thought about getting a beer…but then I realized I was broke. I thought about saying “fuck this shit, I’m out of here”…but then I looked upon the stage, and my whole night - and, I dare say, my whole life - changed.

The band performing before The Diggs was featured a three guitar players, a bass player, two drummers, a back up singer, and an angel on lead vocals. That’s right: an angel. An angel with shoulder length blonde hair, a tight ripped up t-shirt and a lust for life. I didn’t know her name, I didn’t know her past, I didn’t know a damn thing about her--except that she was sent from heaven to make the world a more beautiful place.

This girl was more than just a biscuit – she was gorgeous – wars have been fought over women with her looks. And besides that, she could sing. She sang with a passion and intensity that would impress Joe Cocker. She was going on and on, just singing up a storm about having a broken heart and how she wasn’t sure if she could ever love again. When I heard this, I felt my heart fall into my stomach. A beautiful girl like this…with a broken heart? How could this be? Who would do such a thing? In a world gone wrong, who could help her recover from this broken heart? Enter Jarrod Nesbit.

I had it all planned out. After she got off stage I would strut up to her and offer to buy her a drink. She would be impressed by my cool, confident demeanor - not to mention my new J. Crew rugby shirt – and take me up on this offer. As we walked over to the bar she would be charmed by my quick wit and dry humor. By the time we finished our drinks she would be head over heals in love with me. I would then suggest we ditch the Mint – I heard the band up next really sucks, anyway. We would then drive to the Malibu and take a walk along the beach. After a long walk, we would grow tired and decide to sit on the cool Pacific sand and watch the sun go down. We would then look into one and other’s eyes and realize that there was no place in the world we would rather be.

Yes, it was official: I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this girl. As I watched her on stage as she clenched her fist at her heart I realized she could quite possibly be the perfect girl. I mean, she was smart, sassy, sensitive-

“Married.”

I felt my heart, which had moments ago fallen into my stomach, fall all the way to the floor. I turned around to find a giggling Jason Sheppard staring at me.

“God, can you believe how hot that lead singer is?” The Diggs lead guitar player asked. “Too bad she’s married, Nesbit—though it’d be great if we could fire our lead singer and get her on board”.

She was married? I couldn’t believe it. She’d cheated on me before we even had the chance to meet! How could she?

Needless to say, I was heartbroken. Suddenly her songs of lost love seemed to have an ironic feel. They were songs I should have been singing to her. I stole two drink tickets from the band and drown my Coronas. Man, weird things happen when you show up early for a Diggs show.

Later that night The Diggs played. Highlights included two tracks performed with Paul Holliday, a tribute to Miami Vice wardrobes, and an appearance by Joyce and David Aucoin.

Also, at one point Geoff Brown loudly, and correctly, pointed out that “The Giants suck!”

JN